From volunteering to fostering, Helen and Peter's commitment to caring

From volunteering to fostering, Helen and Peter's commitment to caring

Helen, a former nursery nurse, first considered fostering in her 20s when she encountered several children in foster care at the nursery. However, it wasn’t until over 30 years later that the idea truly became a reality. After meeting Peter and starting their own family, fostering took a backseat as they focused on raising their children.

Throughout the years, the Gloucestershire couple engaged in various voluntary work. They housed exchange students for six-month periods, opened their home to young homeless people through Night Stop in Gloucester, and provided two-week holidays for children from Chernobyl who were in remission from cancer with the Chernobyl Project.

"We cared for many children and young people over the years. We were able to offer a fun holiday experience, taking them on outings and organising activities. This gave us a glimpse into what fostering might be like," Helen explains.

In 2020, after fostering with their local authority, Helen and Peter made the decision to transfer to Nexus Fostering. "The support we received from the local authority just wasn’t enough for the children we had, but since moving to Nexus, we haven’t looked back. The support has been incredible,” they share.

One challenge they encountered while fostering was the lack of information you can find out about the children. “Often, the referrals we read didn’t match the reality when the children arrived. We would try to gather as much information as possible and ask as many questions as we could, but frequently the local authority only had minimal details to provide,” says Peter.

Knowing they had the space and capability to offer a safe and stable home, the couple began to provide respite and short-term placements. After caring for 17 children, they welcomed siblings aged 5 and 6 in 2022.

"After years of saying goodbye to children, we knew we could offer these siblings a permanent, stable home. They’ve settled in so well, and we’re hopeful they’ll stay with us long-term," Helen adds.

Helen opens up about the emotional side of fostering, especially when children leave. "It can be tough. It’s a grieving process, but you hope they go on to live fulfilled lives and are happy. We try to stay in touch with a few of the children we've cared for. Often, the contact fades after a couple of months, but I find comfort in that. It’s a sign they must be happy and settled with their new carers. The initial contact helps ease the transition for them."

Helen and Peter’s two birth children, aged 27 and 29, have been supportive of their fostering journey. "Both of our children have been really encouraging. My daughter, who has two young children of her own, loves having the siblings around. They all play together so well," says Helen.

Peter is especially proud of the educational progress the siblings have made.

"It’s been wonderful to see our young boy’s growth at school. He’s becoming more confident and settled with each passing year. Our young girl’s spelling and English skills are off the scale, and she’s really dedicated to her schoolwork."

Helen fondly recalls a special moment: "Taking the siblings on holiday was a milestone for us. It was the first time we had taken children in our care on a trip away. We went away for three nights, and the eldest returned home and wrote in her diary about all the happy memories she made."

The couple’s love for fostering shines through in their words. "We just want the best for the children. They’re thriving, at school, at home, and in their activities. They’re both great eaters, they sleep well, and they’re always excited to try new things, like drama, violin, youth clubs, football, and even coming to church clubs with me," says Helen.

Helen and Peter describe Nexus Fostering as an agency with a "family feel" that is truly inclusive.

"We can contact anyone at Nexus at any time for support. We love attending the events and activities they organise, from picnics to days out. It’s comforting for the siblings to see that they’re not the only children in care."

When asked about advice for prospective foster carers, the couple is candid:

"The motivation to foster must come from the right place. You must genuinely want to make a difference in a child’s life. It requires determination and resilience, especially during difficult times. There will be challenging moments, but you need to push through. The job satisfaction is immense, and it’s such a moving experience. We wouldn’t want to do anything else."

If you’re interested in becoming a foster carer and helping local children in the Gloucestershire area, arrange a call back from a member of our team here or call 0800 389 0143. We also hosts monthly drop-in mornings for fostering enquiries. Join us for a coffee and a chat on Friday, December 3^rd, from 10am to 12 midday, where you can meet and speak with a member of the local team about becoming a foster carer at their Gloucester office.