How wonderful it has been to raise our birth children alongside foster children

Katie and Rob have been Nexus Fostering Foster carers for over ten years. The pair's desire to foster became apparent when Katie fell sick and spent a long time in hospital and recovery. During her stay, she met a woman whose children were taken into care as she had no support looking after them when she fell ill. Inspired by her situation and the urge to help Katie and her husband Rob decided to investigate fostering.

Katie was a manager and Rob worked in maintenance in residential care at that time. Having touch points with children in care Rob had a good insight into how trauma can affect children. Katie as a manager has great organisation and people skills. However, both decided that returning to their previous job was not what they wanted to do. Instead, they dedicated their lives to fostering.

The pair describes how wonderful it has been to raise their birth children alongside their numerous foster children. 

Fostering has allowed us to watch our children grow, to be at home with them, something we would not have been able to do if we were both working in our previous jobs.

Combining fostering and raising their birth children has always been easy for Katie and Rob. They explain that their birth children have naturally embraced being part of a fostering family.

During the past ten years, the family had many types of young people and children living with them. They had sibling groups, Parent and child placements, unaccompanied asylum-seeking children, and a baby that moved on to adoption after being in foster care with them.

Katie and Rob mention that there are always challenges with fostering, but it's not always with the young people. Some are with parents, some with the social care system but the most important thing is Katie says, ‘Always be professional and always advocate fairly for your young person.’ 

She adds: “It's always best to approach each young person placed with you as a new person, get to know them, and what might have worked in previous situations might not work in this situation.

Always be approachable, calm, and understanding. Don't take anything personally as it's not really aimed at you.

The pair speaks about stand-out memories, but what they mostly remember is seeing young people better their lives and seize all opportunities, that they otherwise wouldn’t have had.

As foster carer representatives Katie and Rob advise new carers always to use the team of professionals around them. Changes take time and keep your records up to date. They also listen to their fellow carers if they have any feedback and take that to the forum on their behalf. When talking to people who are thinking about fostering the pair let them know that they must be aware that it's not all ‘chocolate and flowers.’ It is hard work but also incredibly rewarding.

In terms of support from Nexus Fostering Katie and Rob said: “Nexus Fostering has always been supportive, always above and beyond. Nexus Fostering is like a family; the staff are all approachable day and night and always strive to support their foster carers fully. Nexus Fostering also recognises the positives of their foster carers and supports them with praise.”

So how does the pair sum up fostering in three words? Challenging, Variety, and Fulfilment.

Could you support foster children like Katie and Rob? Find out more about fostering - Why Choose Us? | Nexus Fostering